"What size does he wear?"
She planned to buy her grandson an Under Armor t-shirt. Apparently, it's the only brand he wears. Her son said the 10 year old is a 12. But, the labels were hard to figure out and here was a boy about her grandson's size. Magically appearing in front of her.
Zach wears a 14/16. Large. He's 4'5" and 66lbs. The size of a 9 year old. 10/12 is a medium size for big boys. Zach hasn't fit in a medium in a year! I can't picture a 10 year old Zach's size in a medium! I am not certain she understood the conversation with her son. Are we sure he didn't say the 10 year old is the size of a 12 year old?
So I recommended she get a large. I pointed out, "even if it's big now, he will grow into it". We took a medium and a large Under Armor shirt down the aisle to where I get Zach's shirts. Sure enough, the large Under Armor was the same as the large for Zach's shirts. She's going with the large!
I'm looking at the grandma and smiling to myself. Thinking of Zach's grandmas shopping for him. Over the years I have gotten a lot of calls asking about what size to get him for various things. Usually, right before a purchase is about to be made.
"No, I don't want to get the next size up. I want it to fit him now!"
What a grandparent thing to say. Parents usually prefer something bigger because kids grow so quickly. Grandparents want it to be enjoyed without a wait. Zach has been a large for a long time. At this point, I say go for the large. But, for many years I also said a size up!
Both have said that sentence word for word. And, I love them for it. This grandma reminds me so much of both of Zach's grandma's! She probably was remembering shopping for her own son. But, it's not the same.
Because for your own kids you know what to buy. Your kids are with you trying the cloths on. You know what you are buying fits. But, the labels are different now. The sizes aren't the same. It's a different experience for grandma.
I do believe in fate. I do believe that God provides us with what we need. In that moment, she needed Zach. Kohl's was an impulsive trip for us. Usually, we would have been home sooner then that. But, there was a pull. I can't explain it. But, something told me to be there at that moment.
I've experienced this personally. We all have. But, some people attribute it to something else. I have found some surprising people showing up at surprising times. Yet, their presence had good timing in my life. They are who I needed in that moment.
While this was going on, I saw it for what it is. That few moments we were a part of this woman's life are part of a bigger plan. I got to see my mom and Josh's mom's side of how this works. This woman got the comfort she needed.
At the start of our interaction she was in distress. She was shopping for all of her grandkids. I used a lot of calming words. I reassured her that her instincts are right. I told her about my mom's blog and those phone calls. She felt better being reminded that it's a grandma thing. She also loved the shirts I get Zach when we took her down for the size comparison. Another grandson taken care of!
She mentioned these outfits for the first day of school. I instantly thought of my mom. My mom got all three of her grandkids christmas outfits. She wanted pictures of the kids in their outfit for her holiday card.
Helping that grandma today made me love both of Zach's grandma's more. Seeing their end of these things, is a reminder of the balance they have to maintain. Grandparent's aren't parents. But, it's fun to relive the best memories of parenting with your grandkids. But, how do you do that without crossing the line? That depends on the relationship with your child and their partner.
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| Vacation this year with my mom. |
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| 12 days old. Josh's first father's day. We need more pictures of Zach with Grandma S.!!! He sees her a lot throughout the year! I guess we just never grab a camera! |
My Mom's Blog: The Grandma Chronicles
http://www.grandmachronicles.com/
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