In the dream my parent's neighbor is holding a yard sale in their yard and garage. I go the the garage because that's where the decorations are and anything I come across is in a set for all season and/or months and she's only willing to sell them that way but I only need one or two things from the sections I am looking at.
You might remember from a very detailed dream post I had that I have gotten good at interpreting dreams. This one was just reminding me that I am done collecting my decorations. I was done collecting (mostly) when Zach was born. When I was pregnant, I had to put a lot of them in the garage to protect them from a curious little boy. That made me sad but I had wanted Zach for so long it's a worthy sacrifice.
Zach is so good about not touching my decorations and being gentle with them that on New Year's Eve, when I did the January Decorating Day, I put out a new decoration that had been in the garage since I was pregnant, (the kitchen shelf it's in his arms reach) and Zach didn't touch it but he does admire it. After that dream I decided to introduce my window decoration. I used to include seasonal lights (Christmas tree style) and an inside the window decoration (cotton balls for Winter like snow with white lights, blue beads for Spring like rain and purple lights, river rocks for Summer with green lights, and fake leaves with orange lights for Fall). The inside decorations annoyingly tend to fall off so today I decided to pass on those and just enjoy the lights.
Neighbors always compliment the yard decorations and some have even mentioned missing the window decorations since I stopped. Zach loves the lights (remember he plugged in the Christmas tree) so he was in awe at the window tonight, and couldn't stop looking but was again fabulous at not touching. That just means my coffee table decorations are what's left. But no matter how gentle he is it will definitely be a while for those.
They are just the recent additions to my slowly being able to introduce the decorations that consumed me since we got our first apartment (July 2004 three months before the wedding). I'll never forget the start. In September of that year I got some Hallmark Halloween Jack-o-lantern decorations just to make the apartment look pretty. One was a candy dish and as family helped us move things into the apartment it was nice to have some candy to offer as a thank you (when we moved into the condo I did the same with a Valentine's dish and Valentine's M&M's and they appreciated it. We moved here in February of 2007). I had been thinking about decorating that first apartment since we signed the lease and I've always taken the Month/Season approach long before marriage.
I have been trying to replace the things that had to go away with nonbreakable things so I could still hold onto this. Nice seasonal table linens are now guest linens and we do monthly linens nightly. I feel more like myself with each new thing I can start adding the the Decorating Day checklist. I haven't really been this happy in a long time. I can't use words to describe how good it feels when there is something I put on hold that I can start using again. I really am slowly becoming myself again and Josh notices and Zach loves it. I love him with all my heart and would make these sacrifices all over again. Motherhood is everything I have ever dreamed of and you can't get a better kid. That's exactly why whenever I look at my decoration tubs in the garage I can't help but say to myself "Is he ready for something new?" The coffee table can wait, that was the hardest to put together for each month, but I can't wait, I have plenty of my old self back, only happier. It's important to not just be a wife and mother but to also hold onto my own interests and things that make me, me, the individual. A woman in my own right with things that are important to me that others might not understand why. You don't have to understand, just enjoy. Josh and Zach certainly have been enjoying a more cheerful home.
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