Josh's Fall

On Sunday, the 18th Josh slipped on ice. The whole town was really one giant ice rink. On the 19th he had to have partial hip replacement surgery. He came home last Thursday. Since then, he has worked hard on his physical therapy. He's doing well!

On Monday he goes for his follow-up doctor's visit. Hopefully, that's when he'll find out when he can go back to work. In the meantime, he can't lean forward and reach for stuff. I have never been so aware of how often we reach and lean forward.

I had a two week long panic attack after he fell. I only started to calm down yesterday. He was on the fourth floor in the hospital. I'm petrified of heights. I was able to visit but only twice and they were short visits. I wish I could have managed to stay longer. The first visit took two tries. When the first failed, I talked with the Deacon from our church that was also at the hospital. For my second visit, I prayed in the hospital chapel first.

But we talked on the phone a lot and Josh had pictures of us to help. Most people don't understand why getting to the fourth floor was so hard for me. Those who love me, do. They understand it's not something I can be "cured" of.

When you say "just get over it" you sound like someone who actually thinks conversion therapy works. Conversion therapy is the belief that with therapy you can turn a gay person strait. No, that's not possible. Just like it's not possible to "get over" or "mature out of" anxieties. Anxieties don't make someone immature. It's just a part of who we are. We don't owe anyone an explanation!

With that in mind, I want to thank those who have been there for us. I have a lot of people who have been very supportive during this time. Prayers from everyone including my facebook friends have been working! The support for Josh has helped him feel better and the support for me has helped me calm down and care for Josh better then I could before. So many people ask me how he's doing. That makes the hard part easier for all of us! Thanks again!!!