Monday, October 18, 2010

Getting To Know Me

Hi I'm Fran. I just turned 30 a month ago. My son, Zach is 16 months old. To understand my choice to be a stay at home mom you have to understand me. My husband, Josh, was my first boyfriend. Back in High School I thought no one would want me. We were aquaintances for a couple of years. He was a year ahead of me and one day over the summer between our senior years (his was over, mine was about to start) he walked up to me and we exchanged phone numbers. At the time I was babysitting. We spent most of that summer between taking my old babysitter's son, Alex (who was five then but is now a senior in High School!) and playing with his niece (two then, 13 now). Our relationship started watching each other adore kids. We got engaged a year later and remained engaged all through college. We just celebrated our 6th Wedding Anniversary.

I Majored in Dance in college. We live/grew up in Northern New Jersey but I went to Coker in South Carolina for two years before transfering to Cedar Crest in Allentown, Pennsylvania where I graduated from. At Cedar Crest I Minored in Management since I planned to open my own dance studio as well as took education classes. A requirement for graduation was Ethical Life. We had to answer challenging ethical questions like who do you give a donor heart to a nine year old, a 40 year old father of four, or a 35 year old single mother. I still can't answer that one!!! I decided to volunteer at the After School program since I had worked for the YMCA after school program in High School and wanted to teach. This is where I realized that these kids need me. I had a learning disablility in school and due to that I learned all the study and work tricks that exist. I still miss then third graders George and Daniel who were the two I was in charge off. I wanted to teach. I persued a teaching certificate (that's a later post) and went about subbing and tutoring at the local Sylvan Learning Center. It's unclear whether I was laid off but my kids were second graders mostly and in this economy there isn't a lot of need for second grade tutors. I've only worked four hours since Zach was born.

Zach is my miracle. In college, when I was 21, after two years of engagement Josh and I had sex for the first time. I had said I would wait until marriage but when you have been engaged for two years and the wedding is at least two years away it's not going to happen. My mom was more surprised I made him wait that long!!! Six months after that first time I got pregnant. At 13 weeks I miscarried not knowing I was pregnant. We started trying to conceive in September of 2006. At the time I had a gut feeling it would be two years. That November, at about seven weeks I miscarried again, low progesterone. In February of 2008 I miscarried at eight weeks. In September of 2008, I got pregnant and this one was for real. On Columbus day I saw the two lines I thought I might never see again. At four weeks and five days, Our four year anniversary, I saw Zach's sack for the first time. Pregnancy had it's issues. I was high risk so I had the progesterone medication, gestational diabetes (from the hypoglacimia that developed from a nine year long eating disorder) and eventually a month of bedrest leading to a healthy birth only 12 days early.

What makes me interesting? I maintained a long distance relationship and we have been together since July 6, 1998, I have had three miscarriages, I struggled to conceive, and I am a SAHM to control and anxiety disorder (General Anxiety Disorder and OCD). After all I went through to get Zach I just want to make sure he's taken care of the best way. I don't want him to attend a day care center that ends up on the news.

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