A Charitable Conundrum

At this giving time of year we usually do donate something. We can't afford much, but we do try to give something. Usually, it's a $5 "help the hungry" thing at the grocery store. That part we did three weeks ago. It was $8 this year. But, I want to give more. We just can't this year.

Josh broke his arm two weeks ago. He's not working. We have zero income for the time being. He might be able to do some things around the restaurant starting next week. But, it won't be much so it will be part time. No driving for four more weeks.

Yet, we have been the recipients of so much giving in all this. Josh's parents payed for his replacement glasses, his sister has giving him rides when needed, my parents are helping us financially. Most surprisingly was when the town's police union donated Thanksgiving dinner and a really nice check! We also got gift cards from two organizations in town. Those we get each year to help with groceries.

With the snow yesterday we have found ourselves appreciative of helpful neighbors. One was a single dad I have brought food to over the year. Not cooked but it meant Ziti and Pork Chops he could make for his son. He shoveled his car and my car out. Another shoveled our steps for us since the landscapers hadn't come to the condo complex yet. Last year I told her I am grateful she is my neighbor. Just a random comment. I thought she would appreciate knowing she is appreciated.

I personally have mixed emotions about this. I badly wish I could donate a target gift card to the infant and toddler center my mom volunteers for. But, we can't afford that. In previous years, I would have. It would not have been able to be a large donation. But, it would have helped buy a box of diapers.

I am overwhelmed with gratitude for the help we are receiving. I feel left out because everyone else around us can participate in giving this season and we can't. We do what we can to give throughout the year. We have given more then just that $8 donation in November. I'm just not used to being on the receiving end so much. We have gotten help before. Nothing like this.

Luckily, we had already done the Christmas shopping before Josh broke his arm. We still have to use basically all of our savings. But, we will be okay. Because of the generosity of others. When I pray these are the very people I pray for and thank God for.  Long before any of this happened. That was before all of this. Before the last two weeks.

It's a conundrum. We want to give but can't. I want to buy coats and gift cards for my mom's charity. I want to give to St. Jude's, the Red Cross, Biden and Buttigieg. I want to do another round of $5 for helping the hungry. But, that's not going to happen right now.

I want to thank all of you who are doing for someone what my friends, family, neighbors, and community are doing for us. We are grateful for the help when we need it most. We will do what we can when we can. As we have always done. But, while we can't we appreciate that you do.