More Then You Can Handle

"God doesn't give you more then you can handle"

Have you ever heard that? It's so common my guess is you don't have to be Christian to have heard that saying. I don't think about it much. I trust God. I pray. But, I don't often think about if I am handling too much, too little, or just the right amount.

A long time ago I felt like I had too much to handle. Yet, somehow, everything was always okay anyway. In spite of my worries about how to handle things. Somehow, I was able to handle them.

Things calmed down and got easier to handle again. I still had a lot of stress and a lot to handle. But, it didn't feel like I was about to break. I had already broken. But, God provided support when I broke so I was still able to handle it.

I realized today it's been a long time since my last blog post. I started thinking about why. I've "had a lot on my plate". I've had a lot to handle. It was beginning to feel like too much. Then, somehow, it feels closer to manageable again.

"God doesn't give you more then you can handle"

What changed? Parental instincts I'm guessing. My parent's parental instincts. They must be able to see what I'm not saying in my eyes. Or written on my face. They have been offering support. Making things easier to handle.

Just last night I thought to myself "I think God officially has given me more then I can handle." Today, Zach had a half a day at school. We had lunch with my parents. Out of the blue they offer to do his homework with him and paint pumpkins. They had him for hours! I didn't even ask. That time did wonders for helping me calm down! Finally, I was able to eat without choking!

Yeah, eat without choking. You read that right. Tiny pieces, lots of slow long chewing and for at least two weeks I couldn't get through a meal without choking on part of it. It got better starting with breakfast today though. Still bad, but progress. I narrowed it down to the following possibilities:

1. Physical reaction to all the added stress and anxiety in my life
2. Uvula issues (dangly thing in the back of your throat)
3. Thyroid issues (I'm on medication for hypothyroidism)
4. Esophagus issue is back.

"God doesn't give you more then you can handle"

With food that sentence has become literal! God is trying to get my attention! Why now? I'm ready when you are, God! What's the message?

"God doesn't give you more then you can handle"

So, Zach was mad at me the other day. My cousin gave him his XBox360. I said he had to keep it at Grandma and Pop's (my parents) because he has a Wii U at home. This went on for a while. My dad has trouble hearing and asked "what's going on?" I responded "God's laughing at me." My mom laughed. Zach was acting like I do when I'm mad at her. We're good now.

"God doesn't give you more then you can handle"

That saying isn't quite right. I think He does give us more then we can handle sometimes. But, he also makes sure we have what we need to get through it. I'm not really going to handle our current issues without an actual miracle. But, the time I had today gave me peace. I spent most of it working on crocheting my summer seasonal blanket.

Crocheting is relaxing. Something to focus on that isn't stressful. The summer blanket is full of cheerful colors. While working on that I was thinking about my other in process crochet project.

My mom volunteers for a charity that provides necessities for babies and toddlers. My mom asked if I would make hats. No specific quantity or sizes. Only if I wanted to. So a few days ago I took on that project. One in each size

3 - 6  months (completed)
6 - 9 months (completed)
9 - 12 months (completed)
12 - 18 months (tomorrow)
18 - 24 months (Wednesday)
2T (Thursday)
3T (Friday)
4T (Saturday)

One hat and at least two stripes of the blanket each day. An obsession that is calming me. Keeping my focused. So I can drown out the other stimuli and handle things better.

"God doesn't give you more then you can handle"

Yes, he does. What they really mean is "When God gives you more then you can handle, he will also give you what you need to get through it." To me, that sounds more like it.